Love v. Attachment: What's the difference?

In Star Wars Lore, The Jedi Code had many strict rules, but the most strict of all was the rule of attachment. A  Jedi must never form an attachment. In a person, place, thing, they cannot be attached. But Episode II and Episode III particularly brought this to the forefront. particularly what Jedi Padawan at the time, Anakin Skywalker, said of it. when Padmé said to him she thought the Jedi were forbidden to love, Anakin replied that the Jedi are meant to have compassion, so they're encouraged to love. So... the Jedi are forbidden to have attachment, but encouraged to love?

This would make many in my generation, after and even before, scratch their heads. What's the difference?

I used to be confused by this as well, but after a near falling out with someone I loved dearly, and still do love dearly, it brought the difference into full view to me and I could see it from proper perspective. And there IS a MAJOR difference!

I have heard many times, and I'm sure many believe that Hate is the opposite of Love. But fact of the matter is that Hate is simply another emotion on the spectrum, not opposing love, but an equal emotion that all mankind has. No, Hate is not the opposite of Love. Attachment is.

Love is a popular word in the world today. Yet, the world's idea of love, especially here in the United States, has been twisted, and we've taken Attachment in place of Love in many, many cases.

God's Word has a lot to say about Love. Jesus said "There is no greater love than this, that one would lay down his own life for his friends." The Bible says God himself is Love. If you don't know how to love than you don't know God.

Furthermore, Paul said that even if you had every single one of the Spiritual Gifts offered by the Holy Spirit, but you don't have Love, than it means nothing at all.

So, What is Biblical Love and what is this false advertisement that we call love today?

What is the difference?

What is the REAL difference?

To find the difference you have to look at where you place yourself in the equation of your relationships. Are you serving yourself? Or, Are you serving the one you love?

Paul wrote in 1st Corinthians Chapter 13, verses 4-8 that "Love is patient, love is kind. It doesn't envy, it doesn't boast, it is not proud, it does not dishonor others. It is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered. It keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil, but rejoices in Truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails. But where there are prophecies they will cease; where there are tongues, they will be stilled; where there is knowledge will pass away."

Jetsuna Tenzin Palmo, a Buddhist nun, describes the difference very well and very biblical.

"The problem is that we always mistake the idea of love for attachment. We imagine the gasping and clinging that we have for in our relationships show that we love, where as it is just attachment which causes pain. Because the more we grasp the more we are afraid to lose, of course, we are going to suffer.

"Attachment says: 'I know I love you, therefore, I want you to make me happy.'

"Genuine Love says: 'I love you , therefore, I want you to be happy. If that includes me, GREAT! If it does not include me, I just want your happiness.'

"'Attachment is like holding very tightly, but genuine love is like holding very gently, nurturing but allowing things to flow, not to be held tightly.

"The more tightly w hold on to others, the more we will suffer, but it is very hard for people to understand that. Because, they think that the more they hold on to someone, the more it shows that they care about them. But it's not.

"It's really just that they're holding on and grasping so tightly because they are afraid that they themselves will be hurt.

"Any kind of relationship that imagines that we can fulfill ourselves through another is going to be tricky..

Ideally people should come together already feeling fulfilled within themselves, and thus just appreciating that in the other, rather than expecting the other to supply that well-being which they don't (but should) feel on their own..."

So, many really don't get it and continue to search for something they will never find, or put too much pressure on someone who will inevitably fail them. No one is perfect. No one will will make you feel good. No one will always have the perfect words you need to hear. No one will ever truly satisfy you or make you truly happy. I won't ever do this for a woman long term, and no woman will ever do this for me. It isn't fair to expect this of others, or of myself. We have to realize we are all imperfect, fallen people in need of God.

Real, Genuine love is unconditional. Real love is NOT about YOU.

Paul wrote that wives should submit to their husbands and husbands should give themselves for their wives. Do you get the theme there? Do you understand the message in that?

We are taught in the world that relationships are always 50/50, but that's not how it works. relationships are 100/100. Its giving your all, giving yourself up for the one whom you love. It's your focus being solely on meeting your loved one's needs. It's striving for their joy and their happiness, even at the sacrifice of your own.

You want them taken care of and happy no matter the cost to you. Even if it means losing them. Even if it means they'll be better off without you. Even if the cost for their good and their happiness is you. You do it.

It's willing to sacrifice yourself for her.

If I say "I love you" it means you and your happiness, your needs, and your wants are more important than mine.

Isn't that what Paul was saying?

Isn't that what Jesus was saying?

Jesus gave up everything because he loved and was obedient to His Father, and the Father loved us enough to sacrifice His own Son for us.

That is our example.

"For God so loved the world that he gave his own begotten Son that whosoever believes in Him will not die but have eternal life."

To truly know love as it was designed by God we have to forsake ourselves, let ourselves lowered so that we might lift those who we care for up.

Jesus said that to be the greatest you must become the least. Isn't that how He describes love as well?

So, Love is about them, not you.

Attachment is about you, not them.

Attachment will fail eventually and it will never sustain you.

Love never fails, love is of God and God is love.

So, Love is eternal, and will point you to the One who came and gave himself for us all. By lifting and pointing those that we love toward Him, by being concerned for their physical and spiritual needs before our own, we place ourselves in line of  God's heart, and we will find fulfillment and be sustained for eternity. What more beautiful love could anyone wish for?

"And Now these three remain: Faith Hope and Love. But the greatest of these is Love."